1: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
Yeah, I could; though when I'm stressed out it gets a bit rough.
2: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused?
Confused... lost... abandoned.
3: What if I told you that you were pretty?
I'd say I would prefer a different adjective, but thanks, I guess.
4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”?
No. Generally I've been told; "It's you." Or "Who were you, again?"
5: Are you interested in anyone right now?
Yes. Interested, and... possibly... still with? Too long not hearing from her...
6: What are you looking forward to in the next week?
Nothing, really. It's all the same ol' same ol' week in and week out.
7: Do you want to be single?
Not really. I want to be with Angellica, but the world seems to be against it, as she and her family up and disappeared and none of her friends or I know what happened.
8: Did you go out or stay in last night?
I stayed in, cried, ate ice cream, and watched "Dan Vs..."
9: How late did you stay up last night?
Until roughly three in the morning.
10: Can you recall the last time you realized you liked someone a lot?
Yes. It was about December, 2012.
11: Last three things you had to drink?
Water, water, more water.
12: Have you pretended to like someone?
God no. I've had enough people do that to me to know how it feels, I'd never do that to someone else.
13: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?
No. Those are... those are strong words, I don't use them lightly.
14: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?
Yeah; my neighbors when I went out in my boxers and t-shirt to run the recycle bin out to the corner last Monday.
15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?
Unbearably so. Especially when I don't even know why they're gone...
16: Think back five months ago, were you single?
I don't know. She never ended it... she just was there one moment, and gone the next. No idea if she still cared for me then...
17: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?
I was making up a fantasy alphabet to distract myself from my own thoughts so as to keep myself from crying on my lunch break(again).
18: Hold hands with anyone this week?
19: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?
Probably could, but likely won't. I'm not a big drinker, but a shot now and then with family and friends is fun.
20: What would you name your future daughter?
Alyssa is the first name to pop into my head.
21: Do you miss anyone?
Yes. My grandparents, rest their souls... My dad, even though I still can't bring myself to talk to him after he got sent back to prison. And of course... Angellica; who never leaves my thoughts...
22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?
23: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?
24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?
When I need to be, yes. Though; the moment I let them loose, it's hard to bottle them up again.
25: Have you ever cried from being so mad?
Three to seven times a week, probably.
26: Who did you last see in person?
My mom, like 5 minutes ago when I walked in to the kitchen to get some water and she waved.
27: Are you listening to music right now?
No, because most of the music I listen to is kinda sad or sappy, and I'm attempting not to cry while typing this.
28: What is something you currently want right now?
29: What is the last thing you said out lot?
I believe the proper terminology is 'out loud', and that would probably be; "Thanks for dinner, ma."
30: How is your heart lately?
Missing it's other half...
31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?
Depends on the weather, my hair, and how much the sun is trying to burn me.
32: Are you wearing socks?
No, I'm not wearing socks; why would I wear socks when I'm in my room? They're uncomfortable.
33: What do people call you?
Dakota, Night, Noc, Boy, Hey you, Bubby, Bastard.
34: Will you talk to the person you like tonight?
35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?
My girlfriend just up and vanished, along with her family, and her house went up for sale without me, or any of her friends having any idea why, and it leaves me feeling empty, abandoned, and scared because she simply left me with a message saying she would explain and I haven't heard from her since. My dad got hooked on drugs and shot a guy in the neck, and went to prison for it and I don't know whether to miss him or hate him because I was the one left to clean up the blood and I can still smell the reek of meat and copper in my dreams. My sister, who was the only supportive person in my family, packed up and moved to Colorado with hardly even a goodbye and now doesn't answer my texts or calls. My little sister Sundance who I only recently met is getting put into foster care because my sack of shit biological father is fighting for custody of her, and despite the fact he's only doing it for money she'll probably end up with him and have her childhood ruined by being torn away from my aunt Terri who raised her since she was a baby. I suffer from night terrors and they've recently gotten worse. My brother's band just got a mic and they're really really bad and playing so loudly it's rattling my teeth and giving me migraines... and about a million other less serious things.
36: Who did you last share a bed with?
My dog, sandwich.
37: Did you do something bad today?
38: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?
A few weeks ago, at church.
39: Do you get stressed out easily?
I don't even think I know what it feels like not to be stressed out these days.
40: Will you sing today?
41: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?
Yes. Yes I have. But I'm not sharing it here, either.
42: Who do you go to when you need to talk to someone?
Now, with Angellica gone, my sister moved away, my dad in prison, my mom basically absentee, and all my friends moving on with their lives? No one...
43: Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance?
No. My family can't afford it, so if there's an emergency we take a car, or we walk.
44: What are you listening to right now?
My fingers clicking on this keyboard.
45: What is wrong with you right now?
I feel sick, and empty, and really really just want a night's sleep without nightmares because it feels like it's been months since I've had one.
46: What is on your wrists right now?
A burn from a lightbulb I ran into when tripping over empty air the other day.
47: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wearing right now?
48: What do you like better: hot chocolate or hot apple cider?
Hot chocolate. Cold chocolate. Anything chocolate.
49: Do you make wishes at 11:11?
Am I supposed to?
50: Are you a good artist?
Sometimes, but mostly I'm a bad to middling artist.
51: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?
52: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?
No. Six months ago my life was still shit, but I hadn't had time to adjust as much and wanted to die. Now I just want to be in a coma until things are better. Progress.
53: Ever been on a golf cart?
Yeah; my gramme's bf owns one and I've driven it to church before.
54: Do you have trust issues?
So... so many.
55: Ever stayed up all night on the phone, with who?
With Angellica, many many times... We would talk until the early hours of the morning, fall asleep still on the line, and I would rest easy; my nightmares kept at bay by the sound of her breathing.
56: Do you own something from Hot Topic?
Uhhh... Yeah, a few ties, I think.
57: Do you use chap stick?
I have done so before.
58: Have you ever slapped someone in the face?
Yes, and been slapped in the face in return.
59: Do you have a little sister?
Two, that I know of. Probably more. My biological father is an irresponsible manwhore.
60: Have you ever been to New York?
I lived there as a kid. When I was 2 years old my biological father abandoned me and my mom there and stole our car.
61: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
Yes... she did.
62: Have you hugged someone within the last week?
Hugged my friend Justin a few days ago when he came over to fix my computer.
63: What were you doing at midnight last night?
Staring at my cieling, listening to music, and waiting until I literally couldn't stay awake any more.
64: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?
Not really, but then again I haven't done so very often.
65: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?
There was... not now.
66: Were your last three kisses from the same person?
67: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?
68: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?
With someone. It's not a situation that occurs often, but just having someone else there helps ease my night terrors. Friends, family, loved ones; doesn't matter.
69: Will next Friday be a good one?
Considering the current state of my life, unlikely.
Listening to: Nothing
Watching: Dan Vs